Building a Window
It's the first and the last Febuary 4, 2015. It's cold outside and quiet inside. I've had to reorganize to find this quiet, though I've always appreciated it.
Today, I feel capable. I don't always feel this strong, but I'm remembering the love behind and within me that's brought me this far. It's not the love I've created but the love that faith has allowed me to feel in the presence of One more capable than I will ever be. He is always quiet when he speaks.
I have many loud thoughts that interfere. They are rooted in the insecurities of a past that is mine. This past is part of a gift that came unassembled; one that I have tried to put together and make sense of. The only tools I have our my own hands. You and I, and everyone else, are in the same place but sometimes we forget.
Too many things seem easy until you try them. Looking at your neighbor's hands or their gifts can awaken every insecurity and distract from the gift you've been given, what you are building. You can get lost in removing the splinters that have pierced your skin because you were holding the pieces of your gift too tightly. You can walk away and let someone else have their way with what's yours. You look away for too long and you're left with pieces, and someone else has stolen parts.
The gift is a window. It's the window God gave you when he closed the door. Remember what they said about doors closing? You were never meant to use it in the first place. You are the architect, framer, and painter but not the supplier. Though the window will not be completed until the end, throughout the building process you'll already be able look beyond the reflections on the glass to see the truth. That's when you'll begin to understand your own Creator and the reasons why.
Today, I feel capable. I don't always feel this strong, but I'm remembering the love behind and within me that's brought me this far. It's not the love I've created but the love that faith has allowed me to feel in the presence of One more capable than I will ever be. He is always quiet when he speaks.
I have many loud thoughts that interfere. They are rooted in the insecurities of a past that is mine. This past is part of a gift that came unassembled; one that I have tried to put together and make sense of. The only tools I have our my own hands. You and I, and everyone else, are in the same place but sometimes we forget.
Too many things seem easy until you try them. Looking at your neighbor's hands or their gifts can awaken every insecurity and distract from the gift you've been given, what you are building. You can get lost in removing the splinters that have pierced your skin because you were holding the pieces of your gift too tightly. You can walk away and let someone else have their way with what's yours. You look away for too long and you're left with pieces, and someone else has stolen parts.
The gift is a window. It's the window God gave you when he closed the door. Remember what they said about doors closing? You were never meant to use it in the first place. You are the architect, framer, and painter but not the supplier. Though the window will not be completed until the end, throughout the building process you'll already be able look beyond the reflections on the glass to see the truth. That's when you'll begin to understand your own Creator and the reasons why.
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